I’ve been told that because I like to make up silly songs and then sing them in all sorts of absurd situations and occurrences, that I am trying to turn my life into a Hollywood musical. Since I was first told that, I’ve come to completely agree with that, and I think that is awesome. But I have songs for everything.

When you become a boss, you don't think straight. It's better to be a leader than a boss. That is why I do my share of the cleaning. That is how to show the way to young people. I am trusting that I am leading them in a good way.

But here’s one I guess that’s more important to me. It’s not something I confess regularly. But every night before I go to bed, I pull out old issues of Archie comics and read them.

I have a habit of – thought habits. I try to total up words in a phrase or a sentence and then divide it to see if I get an even number. Like true love divided by two is four. There’s four words in each things, four and four. ... So, I don’t want an odd number, I want an even number. I do that a lot in my head.

Do keep a thesaurus, but in the shed at the back of the garden or behind the fridge, somewhere that demands travel or effort. Chances are the words that come into your head will do fine, eg “horse”, “ran”, “said”.

Do restrict your browsing to a few websites a day. Don’t go near the online bookies – unless it’s research. […] Do not search amazon.co.uk for the book you haven’t written yet.