That time I congratulated a waitress on being pregnant.

I’m president of my neighbourhood association. At my first meeting there was a discussion about developments the association should oppose. I said: “Nothing could be as bad as that horrible new house next to the church.” “I designed that,” the chairman replied. I shut up.

I did an interview years ago and, after it finished, I made some passing comment about sex getting better as you get older – and they used that as the headline. The day the paper came out, I was in a restaurant with the family when a woman on the table next to me leaned over and said, in a sultry voice, “I read your article this morning.”

Do you have 10 pages? Once, I was dancing in a costume that was like a corset. During a move, the corset ripped and exploded, and I had to carry on doing the number practically in my jockstrap.

Working in farming in Somerset at 18, there were elements that were awful, and they were all really edifying. I mean, feeding chickens in sleet was hard work but I am so glad I did it.

I don’t care that much about legacy. Within family I do, but not externally.

Sickeningly, it’s probably my wife, because she’s a legend.

Football player of the year 4th XI 2002.

Rolling a quad bike.

Not having my injuries: shoulders, knees and ankles. I did a lot of contact sports as a kid.