What is the most important lesson life has taught you?

Originally asked

The Guardian, to a different person each week, The Q&A

Verbatim recurring item in The Guardian Q&A; two fully readable publisher-hosted respondent pages establish institutional recurrence.

You answer as yourself. Nobody on FLAPSS answers as anybody else.

Recorded Paul Kalanithi said elsewhere, not written here
I remember the moment when my overwhelming uneasiness yielded. Seven words from Samuel Beckett, a writer I’ve not even read that well, learned long ago as an undergraduate, began to repeat in my head, and the seemingly impassable sea of uncertainty parted: “I can’t go on. I’ll go on.” I took a step forward, repeating the phrase over and over: “I can’t go on. I’ll go on.” And then, at some point, I was through.

The New York Times, Sunday Review, 24 January 2014 source ↗

Others on this question

View all 137 →
Maggie O'Farrell Irish-British novelist
To keep going and never give up, and to enjoy it to the absolute full because, at any moment, the curtain can fall.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 25 March 2023 source ↗
John Simm English musician and actor
Live in the moment. Enjoy life because time cruelly speeds up as you get older and becomes scarily finite.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 11 March 2023 source ↗

More from Paul Kalanithi

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Question What have you come to understand about what it means to be human? Values & belief
Everyone succumbs to finitude. I suspect I am not the only one who reaches this pluperfect state. Most ambitions are either achieved or abandoned; either way, they belong to the past. The future, instead of the ladder toward the goals of life, flattens out into a perpetual present. Money, status, all the vanities the preacher of Ecclesiastes described, hold so little interest: a chasing after wind, indeed.
Recorded Stanford Medicine magazine, Spring 2015, 23 February 2015 source ↗
Question What would you like to leave your children? Death & what remains
Yet one thing cannot be robbed of her futurity: my daughter, Cady. I hope I’ll live long enough that she has some memory of me. Words have a longevity I do not. I had thought I could leave her a series of letters — but what would they really say? ... There is perhaps only one thing to say to this infant, who is all future, overlapping briefly with me, whose life, barring the improbable, is all but past. That message is simple: When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied.
Recorded Stanford Medicine magazine, Spring 2015, 23 February 2015 source ↗
Question How close have you come to death? Death & what remains
I rolled back the images. Looked again. There it was. A new tumor, large, filling my right middle lobe. It looked, oddly, like a full moon having almost cleared the horizon. Going back to the old images, I could make out the faintest trace of it, a ghostly harbinger now brought fully into the world. I was neither angry nor scared. It simply was. It was a fact about the world, like the distance from the sun to the Earth.
Recorded The New Yorker, Page-Turner — an excerpt from When Breath Becomes Air, 11 January 2016 source ↗
Question Has knowing that you will die changed how you live? Death & what remains
I began to realize that coming face to face with my own mortality, in a sense, had changed both nothing and everything. Before my cancer was diagnosed, I knew that someday I would die, but I didn’t know when. After the diagnosis, I knew that someday I would die, but I didn’t know when. But now I knew it acutely. The problem wasn’t really a scientific one. The fact of death is unsettling. Yet there is no other way to live.
Recorded The New York Times, Sunday Review, 24 January 2014 source ↗

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