I wanted to meet Quentin Tarantino for Django Unchained but he had Jamie Foxx in mind – that one hurt.

Not being able to bring my career back into place.

I bought a BMW 7 series and my best mate said: “I don’t think you should buy this, bro, it’s too cheap.” And I said: “Let’s live the dream” and put my foot down hard on the accelerator and the bottom of the engine and the gearbox blew out.

That I never found a way to stay in a relationship long term. I always feel trapped.

Eight or nine years ago, I disgraced myself in the Japanese ambassador’s home in Dublin, at a celebration for my late mother-in-law’s book about living in Japan. Afterwards, when I had to apologise, she told me it was the worst night of her life and, because I was drunk enough not to remember the details, it will never not be the most embarrassing night of my life. People are filling in details even now – “Remember when you fell under the table during the first course?”

I hope the happiest moment is still ahead of me.

Walking along Oxford Street on Saturday pulling a shopping trolley that my mother bought me. I remember saying, “I’m never going to use that!” and there I was, very grateful to have it in my life. She died before Christmas and I can’t ring her to tell her that she was right.

Never be rigid in your thinking, be open.

Not being able to breathe – I get very panicky at the thought.

A hairdresser – I still want to be a hairdresser.