Yet one thing cannot be robbed of her futurity: my daughter, Cady. I hope I’ll live long enough that she has some memory of me. Words have a longevity I do not. I had thought I could leave her a series of letters — but what would they really say? ... There is perhaps only one thing to say to this infant, who is all future, overlapping briefly with me, whose life, barring the improbable, is all but past. That message is simple: When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied.
Death & what remains
What would you like to leave your children?
44 answers answered between 2006 and 2026 one of 25 in The Q&A
Originally asked
The Guardian, to a different person each week, The Q&A
Verbatim recurring item in The Guardian Q&A; two publisher-hosted respondent pages establish institutional recurrence.
You answer as yourself. Nobody on FLAPSS answers as anybody else.
On the record
Public figures who have answered a question like this elsewhere. Quoted from the source shown, not written for FLAPSS.
Read by field
Everyone
Science and medicine 2
Arts and letters 31
Politics and public life 4
Business and finance 3
Technology 1
Sport 2
Read by age
Any age
In their thirties 6
In their forties 7
In their fifties 9
In their sixties 15
Seventy and beyond 5
Paul Kalanithi
Neurosurgeon and writer
That they were loved.
1 answer from members
@aliabbasi
builder
I want to leave my children three foundational tools to navigate the world:
Life skills: The practical capability and independence to take care of themselves, solve everyday problems, and handle adult responsibilities with ease.
Confidence: A self-belief rooted in resilience, knowing they have worth, deserve to take up space, and can handle failure without letting it define them.
A sense of humor: The ability to find levity in life's absurdity, laugh at themselves, and keep perspective when things don't go according to plan.
If they leave home with these three things, they'll have everything they need to build a meaningful life.
More on death & what remains
- What would you like to be remembered for? 214 answers
- How close have you come to death? 209 answers
- What song would you like played at your funeral? 178 answers
- If you had only one day left to live, how would you spend it — and what would you deliberately avoid doing? 54 answers
- What happens when we die? 51 answers
- How would you like to die? 44 answers