I shucked oysters for a day without the proper knife or gloves. I had to go to hospital as I’d ripped my hands up. I can’t recommend it as a career option.

Magician’s assistant on a cruise ship for two weeks when I was 19. When I was meant to be being levitated, I was silently crying while pretending to be unconscious as I hung limply off a metal pole. It was bleak.

I worked in a petrol station on the A1 one summer. I enjoyed it except when I was on latrine duty.

I was a Harrods store detective for a day. I was so bad at it, one of the other detectives thought I looked suspicious and reported me.

It’s like digging a field together: it’s hard work, not very glamorous, but you can stand back and think, “We did that.”

I wish I’d told my mother that, in all the years I knew her, she was never once boring. We weren’t demonstrative, so that would have meant that I loved her.

The moment my daughter was born in 1999, because it took me seven years to conceive.

I had no female role models growing up. I lived an incredibly sheltered life: there was no TV at home and we had no visitors. It wasn’t until rock and pop came into my life that I concocted myself as a role model.

I am going straight to cremation like David Bowie, so there would be no funeral.

Romantic love – what a con. (I do still believe in it.)